The Plop O'Doom explained

I have earlier referred to the Plop O’Doom, of which I am a master, and here I will explain it for those who would like to attempt this difficult, yet highly effective, maneuver. The Plop O’Doom can be simply defined as a contrivance to gain control. In its essence, one stops and plops until one gets one’s way.

The Plop can be performed anywhere. It has physical, emotional and metaphysical components. At its most masterful execution, the Plop is massive, heavy and portentous. With consistent practice, The Plop can be learned, but to take it to its most immovable state, it must become metaphysical.

The physical component: settle down into a large and comfortable sitting plop.

The emotional component: stone faced. Do not appear ruffled or in any kind of a hurry. Appear intent on your planned destination, irresponsive to any commands, pleas or entreaties.

Note: The mastery of this emotional component is essential to take the Plop to its most doomful level. Think heavy. Think bulky.

Now, the metaphysical. Become one with the ground, cemented in, or better yet, melted.
Remain in this welded state until convenient, or you become bored. Once you have downgraded your plop to a simple sit, proceed in the direction in which you were originally headed, which is opposite of that which your handler intended. One can always re-employ the Plop when necessary. Masters can perform it at will.