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Pre-grooming. Imagine how good I look now! |
If there were a dog CrossFit category, I'd be in. If awards were given for good grooming, however, I'd be out.
Given that everyone needs to come clean eventually, even me, I decided to do it CrossFit style. You know, 20 brutal minutes yields incredible results.
So I called on my friend Karen Hayes, who not only is a CrossFitter in superb shape, but also owns a mobile grooming van in Natick called
Pawsible Solutions. Like CrossFit—you hate to go, glad you did it when it's over—I knew I was in for it when she pulled up in my driveway.
Dad lured me outside with a "let's go in the car" bait-and-switch, and when I balked outside the van, Karen just picked up all 90 stubborn pounds of me and popped me in. Now, given that my equine tendencies (I fall asleep standing up, pick up my hooves—I mean paws—for cleaning, spook at nothing, balk, am extraordinarily stubborn, etc. etc.) include performing like a bucking bronco, her picking me up is no mean feat.
I quickly overcame my shock and, given that this was my first time in a van, plopped right in the driver's seat, just to see what it was like.
Somehow, Karen got me out of there, got me groomed, and voila, I'm a new man. Karen also does dog-walking and pet sitting, and I can tell you, when she says "walk," I do it. Just like any CrossFitter would.